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Thread: Inventions you wish you could make...

  1. #21
    Corwyna's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by teds :D View Post
    some sort of gps thing that FINDS MY FUCKING KEYS OR THE FUCKING CLICKER
    Irradiated key chain and Geiger counter. Fixed!
    Corw

  2. #22
    Morax Marbas's Avatar
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    I would like to invent a device to punch people in the face via the internet.

  3. #23
    Spang's Avatar
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    A Training methodology to teach monkeys to roll joints, then sell the trained monkeys to people.

  4. #24

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    A pill that makes my farts smell like cinnamon.

  5. #25
    Donor cullnean's Avatar
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    Mechanical legs for an aft
    Sent from my Lumia 610 using Board Express

  6. #26
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    After some time on fhc ... one of these:


    Edit: refering to those things in the cabinet.

  7. #27
    Qui Shon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Corwyna View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by teds :D View Post
    some sort of gps thing that FINDS MY FUCKING KEYS OR THE FUCKING CLICKER
    Irradiated key chain and Geiger counter. Fixed!
    http://www.keyringer.com/


    Quote Originally Posted by Cortess View Post
    After some time on fhc ... one of these:


    Edit: refering to those things in the cabinet.
    I'd rather take the "What If" machine
    WoT: Mike_Hammer
    Tanks are like Pokemon, gotta collect 'em all.....



    All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.
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  8. #28
    walrus's Avatar
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  9. #29
    Corwyna's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Qui Shon View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Corwyna View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by teds :D View Post
    some sort of gps thing that FINDS MY FUCKING KEYS OR THE FUCKING CLICKER
    Irradiated key chain and Geiger counter. Fixed!
    http://www.keyringer.com/
    But my version does not need batteries on the key chain, so it is more reliable
    Corw

  10. #30
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    I would like to invent a website that works as a shopping centre for high street stores. Most already have their own website but they tend to be shite and I need to pay for delivery and returns several times. They can build a an out of town shopping centre, why can't they build a fucking website that does the same. Amazon for clothing brands.

    I would like a decent 3d mouse. Why should my trusty mouse always be confined to two dimensions. It needs three, the ability to shake to go back, gesture control and basically all the shit you can use a gyro in a phone for on a mouse.

    I would like an app that cuts a phone off when it reaches X minutes. No more big bills from kids since carriers apparently don't want to because of : profit:. If you want to get uber then add the ability to switch NSFW content off and always on gprs so I can protect kids from pony porn and know where they are mid pedobear kidnap.

    I would like the ability to photograph my gas and electric meters and it send the reading direct to the company to bill me properly.

    I would like a flat screen television table that is touchscreen and I can play board games, order from tesco and doesn't cost a thousand pounds.

    I would like to have an app that scans receipts so that throughout a month I know exactly what I have spent from where. For extra points it would upload to pc where you get :more graphs: and breakdown of spending. Ideally I could then let the app sell this data and in return provide me with relevant offers and discounts.

    I would like a television that knows who I am and what I buy so that the advertising is directly relevant to me and I don't have to watch that cunt lapping whore master from the aviva adverts.

    I would like a facebook / flikr / onebit.us plug in that allows me to export my photos to a physical photo book for reasonable monies. You can get really nice online photo albums for not a lot now but :effort: puts me off.
    Last edited by Fourfingers frankie; August 4 2012 at 10:37:35 AM.
    statistically 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang repping

  11. #31
    Dogbeast's Avatar
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  12. #32
    Doomed Predator's Avatar
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    Do these inventions have to be plausible or can they just be wishful thinking?


    Because I'd like to see computers and any kind of gadget that relies on procesors,etc. to be upgradable by buying a pack of "grey goo". Just stick the goo in a special port and it will upgrade your components.


    Some sort of spray/gel that gets rid of scratches would be great too.

  13. #33
    Donor Sparq's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Doomed Predator View Post
    Some sort of spray/gel that gets rid of scratches would be great too.
    Well, we're making progress there. I saw an article the other day about the use of "liquid skin" (a concoction of skin cells and I guess some kind of support media) to treat leg ulcers. It does seem to improve the rate of healing when used appropriately.

    So maybe we'll get there yet!

    There is a series of military science fiction books I enjoy called Hammer's Slammers, they use an equivalent technology in the novels to the one you propose called something like "sprayseal" (iirc) for battlefield injuries ranging from cuts and scratches to stabilising serious burns (heat or chemical). It anesthetises the injury, breaks down damaged tissue and begins healing while protecting from infection.

    It'd be fantastic to have something like that available, one day.

  14. #34
    Doomed Predator's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sparq View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Doomed Predator View Post
    Some sort of spray/gel that gets rid of scratches would be great too.
    Well, we're making progress there. I saw an article the other day about the use of "liquid skin" (a concoction of skin cells and I guess some kind of support media) to treat leg ulcers. It does seem to improve the rate of healing when used appropriately.

    So maybe we'll get there yet!

    There is a series of military science fiction books I enjoy called Hammer's Slammers, they use an equivalent technology in the novels to the one you propose called something like "sprayseal" (iirc) for battlefield injuries ranging from cuts and scratches to stabilising serious burns (heat or chemical). It anesthetises the injury, breaks down damaged tissue and begins healing while protecting from infection.

    It'd be fantastic to have something like that available, one day.
    While that would be cool to have I meant a spray to fix scratches on your phone/computer/other gadget you clawed.

  15. #35
    Donor Sparq's Avatar
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    How about a spray to retroactively take better care of your shit.

  16. #36
    Doomed Predator's Avatar
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    Because others can scratch it, unless I should force anyone wanting to use my phone to use latex gloves.

  17. #37
    indeterminacy's Avatar
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    I would like to author an extension to HTML that enables scratch and sniff, and sell it to all the porn hosts.

  18. #38
    Pacefalm's Avatar
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    It would have been cool if I was the inventor of the laser
    I would have a nobel prize and can be all like 'hey look at me I invented the laser'
    That would have been pretty cool


    Last edited by Pacefalm; April 9 2011 at 9:52 PM.

  19. #39
    Donor Spaztick's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Doomed Predator View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Sparq View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Doomed Predator View Post
    Some sort of spray/gel that gets rid of scratches would be great too.
    Well, we're making progress there. I saw an article the other day about the use of "liquid skin" (a concoction of skin cells and I guess some kind of support media) to treat leg ulcers. It does seem to improve the rate of healing when used appropriately.

    So maybe we'll get there yet!

    There is a series of military science fiction books I enjoy called Hammer's Slammers, they use an equivalent technology in the novels to the one you propose called something like "sprayseal" (iirc) for battlefield injuries ranging from cuts and scratches to stabilising serious burns (heat or chemical). It anesthetises the injury, breaks down damaged tissue and begins healing while protecting from infection.

    It'd be fantastic to have something like that available, one day.
    While that would be cool to have I meant a spray to fix scratches on your phone/computer/other gadget you clawed.
    Called polish and wax.

  20. #40
    Sacul's Avatar
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    A cloning device.
    I would clone Edna a million times over and each and everyone of them will be dedicated to a site shitposting it into oblivion.

    I dont think the world is ready tho.

    Also a 'not needing to sleep pill', all the benefits of sleep minus the time it takes.
    Not enough hours in a day.

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