A new day dawned, the good King Brent stood in his tent looking over a map of the lands and information that was collected by his best scouts.
His visions had come to fruition, a mighty plague was near, and he knew in the depths of his balls that he must best this adversary in combat, to lay claim to the throne.
He was not worried though. The foe, for all its evils was no match of him and his loyal men.
The Technetium-Jews are mysterious, rumored to be thieves of the highest order, with the most elite mercenaries guarding their vast hoards of riches they carry with them.
They bribe, and cheat their way through their foes, sowing disunity in their enemies ranks, buying loyalty from soldiers, and corrupting their generals into treason, with vast chests of rare sexual devices.
They could corrupt anyone, and any army...
...but not this Kings army. Not his steadfast and sturdy men. Brent's men can NOT[/u] be corrupted!
For they have all drank from the fountain of glory, and driven by the powers of syphilis it imbued in them, they developed a feverish loyalty to strong King Brent.
King Brent knew he must attack now, the Technetium-Jews preparations were not complete.
He did not bother with finesse, planning or thinking. King Brent said: "This must be a swift, decisive battle, with no chance for the vulgar liars to talk", to his Jester. He summoned his three most atrocious barbarian commanders; Lime Thodii, Tveir Dreadnaughts Booley, and Fita Kisa.
He explained that they must charge together, and strike at the same foe, to cripple it before the foul words can corrupt their minds. They must be fast, and efficient, and they must take only their most elite men.
The day preparations saw the king mount his stud, and when the men were all secured with earmuffs, he withdrew his sword, and mounted his steed, aptly named Sleipnir. A gift from his old drinking friend, Odin.
He gave a rousing and powerful speech, but it fell on deaf ears, giving him the advantage against these powerful wordsmiths. His men, deaf to words couldn't be corrupted with lies and reason. He smiled, swung his arm forward to motion "advance", and his army did charge towards the Technetium-Jews camp, with amazing speed. Charged with furor to kill this foul enemy, the men powered forward with all the power of syphilis they could muster in their loins.
Gold Bars and heavy jewels smashed into the ground with tremendous power, the devious Technetium-Jews were attempting to distract the men with wealth, while at the same time, attempting to kill them with it.
This was something no man had seen before, such a display of opulence and confidence in the greed of men.
The Technetium-Jews had chosen the wrong foe for kind this attack.
Brent's army swiftly descended upon the Technetium-Jews, and for all their gold, lies, and malice, they could not stop their siege engines being annihilated by the sexually charged, ravenous, elite squad that served the good King Brent.
The battle was quickly turning to the favour of King Brent, though far from over.
When, unexpectedly, the Technetium-Jews ascended to the skies! fleeing the battlefield!
They had demon machines to save them, and yet by doing so, they abandoned their mercenary men to die to the forces of the majestic King Brent.
He looked skyward, and ordered his men to loose arrows at the cowards, but they moved quickly towards the heavens on their demon contraptions, escaping injury and honour.
King Brent cursed the ill-moraled deviants, he knew that they would not be caught, and that they would amass another filthy force with their wealth and lies...
...But alas, he could do naught...
King Brent, after bedding the last of the women from the dentists tents frolicked among his men. Never had the army felt so inspired. The warriors stood around, exclaiming at the fabulous wealth they had overcome to secure a victory on this field. inspired with confidence, they drank heartily.
Brent stood with his men, and drank with them. He proclaimed many times: "You're all my sons, and when I rule, you will find your names, and families, honoured for all time".
The men cheered, and the drinking continued for days...