The scene: Thursday night, Snuff Box are elite PvPing on the Tama gate w/ instalock ships and lots of RR, just in case some of the Caracals and Iterons fight back.
I find a Muninn on scan a couple of systems over, and probe it out. Warping to it with my Deimos, I quickly find out it's sat on a wormhole, and he engages me first (without any tackle n1)
I blast right back at him, losing scram three times as I move away from him to get bump-run-ups, and the wormhole twitches, a fearsome Osprey plopping onto screen. Check. The Muninn's shield loss suddenly slows right down, and with a 100% increase in hostiles, I call for backup.
Backup arrives just a minute later, and a optimistic Muninn dies, leaving behind rubbish salvage. However, the same corporation keep on appearing in local long afterwards, so our French war hero vmmmmffffs himself into the unknown, to find an entire fleet (four or five) angry hostiles waiting on the other side. He baits with his Cynabal on the known side, and the enemies jump through and engage him - that's our cue to send a Phobos into the wormhole, bubble up and we light a professional cyno, dropping 7 or so BLOPS.
The startled enemies zoom back to the wormhole, and we excitedly follow the startled hostiles, enthusiastically pumping our MWDs as we pass through into the C2.
Enemies dead, we high five each other to congratulate ourselves, and an observant corp member reports:
"the wormhole is about to collapse..."
I break into a sweat.
Snuff Box is a very poor corporation - our Tech Level Two battleships are all we have in the world, our meagre Slave clones all that stop us from caving in to the call of ending it all.
Our French hero confirms my desperate enquiry - he DOES have a covops in here with us, but we have no clue where we might end up. I ask on comms who's the poorest. A destitute, gangrene ridden friend weedily calls out - "me, please sir... Eddie Valvetino..." I do the honourable thing and tell him to jump home - the wormhole collapses - MattfighT decided he wanted to take the coward's way home instead of eddie.
Eddie, the gentleman that he is, bursts into tears - we're all too distraught to be able to embrace him or offer any words of comfort (I think maybe Matt said something helpful like "So long, spackers!")
Frenchy Mc Frencherson finds us an exit - we pile through in an orderly fashion, discovering ourselves many many lightyears from home, in the boring depths of Minmatar lowsec and on top of an exceedingly unlucky Armageddon. Many boring cloaked minutes passed, the only consolation being that with so many faggotty alts, we got to use our favorite travel method to return home - the cyno.
We returned home to the embraces of our imaginary girlfriends and wives, thankful that they have us safely in their arms after such a harrowing sense of uncertainty and loss.
We live to battle against overwhelming Drakey evil once more - for how long, who knows. We returned wearily to the gate, and continued to destroy all evil that dared pass into Sujarento.