The "OH MY GOD MY TEAM WENT FULL RETARD %@$%#^$@!" Megathread

[Tai]

To prevent rage from shit teams scrubbing up the good threads.

Just had a terrible loss on Steppes. Me chilling in my Pershing, spawned south side. Our team had like 2 Lowes and a KT, a Panther II and me as our tops, bunch of mid tier shit filling out the rest. They have a Lowe, two Ferdis and an ISU. I start out going the valley on the east, near where I spawned. Check the mini map, ENTIRE FUCKING TEAM GOING SAME WAY. FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.

Turn around, go to defend the western rocky bit, expecting some others to come with. M4 and a VK3601. This is going to go well. Inform team they are retarded and better steamroll that flank. I kill an M4 and a half that try to come at me around a rock. All the while, I'm yelling for some of our mediums to come the fuck back or for everyone else to rush and cap. Then get gangraped by a Lowe, a VK3001, a Ferdi and ISU. Tracked twice and lit on fire.

I check to see how the other flank is doing. Our entire team is playing peekaboo with the last Ferdi near the enemy cap/the spot where you come out of the valley.

At 60% of our base getting capped, someone pings "Back to Base!"

Fuck scrubs.

[Skraeling]

clearly need more platoon with my panther tai.

you get up close and sodomize them, i snipe from somewhere preferably far far away.

[DHB FooFighter]

Playin in my 212 i love the random idiots who shout "ARTY WHY DON"T YOU KILL ANYTHING AAAAAAAARRRRRRGH YOU SUCK"

trying to tell them that im not interesting in killing shit but taking as much health off t9-10s as possible is just beyond my level of caring at this point

[Bazman]

You should obviously be instapopping all medium tanks that they come across as soon as you spot them. ffs newb

[Xiang Jiao]

This thread was made with my feelings in mind. Thanks, Tai!

Pub games are seriously getting worse. This last week I've seen more shit teams than any other. WTF Wargaming? Your marketing is too effective!

[untilted]

srsly ... why do people insist to play peek-a-boo when they are outnumbered?

sandriver, we're starting east. i move my patton north up the dune, a t32 and tiger II follow me. i spot the following tanks on the other side of the dune: is-4, patton, löwe, tiger II and vk(db). and what do these two thundering retards of tier8 heavies do? they play peek-a-boo around the slope instead of taking cover from arty behind the dune. unsurprisingly they get killed in less than 30 seconds .. at which point i'm the only defender on the northern flank left. now the enemy breaks with those five tanks through to our base (afterall a patton is quite soft when fired upon by 5 tanks).

what would have happened if those fucking two heavies would have stayed behind the dune (not only save from those tanks, but also save from enemy arty)? the enemy advance would have had the choice to make a hard push with likely losing quite a few tanks to our arty or sitting in place and watch their southern flank get slaughtered.

instead we lost the game in less than 5 minutes.

fucking retards.

[Tordin Varglund]

Doubles gonna poast~

[Tordin Varglund]

Spend 3 min solokilling T20, KV5 and Lowe in IS, take a look at team status, all teammates dead.

not big surprise.

*
Defeat
Battle: Arctic Region 25. september 2011 01:13:37
Vehicle: IS
Experience received: 943
Credits received: 38*668
Battle Achievements: Master Gunner, Sniper


FFFFFFUUUUUUUU.jpg just doesnt fucking cut it in this game sometimes..

[Warpath]

Just had a game where i was the biggest tank, and some total retard on our team in a P4 constantly blocking me when ever i tried to move around him until half our team were dead. ended up killing him just to get rid of the twat.

[Carlo Curiosus]

Just had a game where i was the biggest tank, and some total retard on our team in a P4 constantly blocking me when ever i tried to move around him until half our team were dead. ended up killing him just to get rid of the twat.

Probably trying to earn compensation for damage . Had a KV-13 follow my IS-4 all round the map bumping into me one time (but at least he wasn't blocking me).

EDIT: Oh yeah, and he died to artillery (probably) aimed at me .

[Xiang Jiao]

As the dumb loses are piling up this weekend and my win rate steadily goes down, I have this inspiring match on Westfield where it's starting well, my Pz4 and a SU-85 are taking down a Tiger up in the tree line, then BAM, a SU-152 one shots me, and then proceeds to wreck our entire team on the hill. I start seeing red, and I notice there's some little faggot in a T-28 hiding behind the houses in A0. I click on the mini map and tell him to stop hiding like a coward. His response: "All the other tanks are bigger than me. I'm saving money." To think this idiot will be in a derp KV very soon. I told him be a big man and just quit the battle, and I get this response "lolol stfu". If you see some dimwit in a T-28 or KV called xxdisturbedxx, shell him for me. Fuckers like this, the fubared spotting system, and the no damage crits are ruining this fine game.

[Ombey]

Man, I 've had a few of these idiot games this weekend. I always say at the start of the game to spread out evenly, or words to that effect- and have been getting ignored or "who put you in charge" responses. Thing is, if the lemming train takes off, I feel I HAVE to go and cover the open flank, knowing I'll have a miserable short match when I get stream rolled.

had one game in my IS-3 where I fought up the road on the tracks side of Himmelsdorf, facing quite high odds and doing well- took out another IS3, a Lowe and a Tiger P. Made it almost all the way to the enemy base when ours starts to get ninja-capped, so I hightail it back with a Panther. Panther stops the cap while I am in transit, and some dead twat says "lolol newb IS-3, camp more".... clearly seeing me nearly back in our base and jumping to conclusions....and ignoring the fact I had 3 kills. I sent him a tersely worded message just before the game ended.

[Devec]

I hate the Malinovka map with a passion mainly because everyone always seems to decide to camp the fuck out of both sides or decides to rush toward the enemy base. Granted it is a terrible map though.

I do also get a lot of complaints for stealth tactics with my kv-1s. Apparently I'm supposed to run into enemy fire with my weakly armoured tank and welp instead of being cautious and destroying anything insight with my 122mm cannon. Most of it is rabble rabble rabble heavy tank rabble.

Also I remember a case on the Lakeville map where two KV-5's decided to camp the mountain passage. As I had a feeling that could go wrong I decided to back them up in my KV-1S to give them at least A chance I positioned myself behind them. An artillery backed us up as well. However the arty positioned itself so it could be spotted and shot up from the top of the hill so it died very quickly. Then the KV-5's started doing peekaboo tactics which lasted quite a long while and wasn't very inefficient killing a few tanks and giving cover for me so I could deliver a few shots as well. However at some point the KV-5's with about 80% health each decided to go over the hill only to be shot up by artillery within seconds. Leaving me with about 4 evil tanks to deal with in my kv-1s because as soon as the KV-5's were dead they of course started pushing over the hill.

[Dogbeast]

I love it on cliff, when no one decides to cover the west side straightway, and what happens? A lowly scout comes roaming through killing all arty and starts capping.... Terrible teams are terrible.

[Xiang Jiao]

Man, I 've had a few of these idiot games this weekend. I always say at the start of the game to spread out evenly, or words to that effect- and have been getting ignored or "who put you in charge" responses. Thing is, if the lemming train takes off, I feel I HAVE to go and cover the open flank, knowing I'll have a miserable short match when I get stream rolled.

had one game in my IS-3 where I fought up the road on the tracks side of Himmelsdorf, facing quite high odds and doing well- took out another IS3, a Lowe and a Tiger P. Made it almost all the way to the enemy base when ours starts to get ninja-capped, so I hightail it back with a Panther. Panther stops the cap while I am in transit, and some dead twat says "lolol newb IS-3, camp more".... clearly seeing me nearly back in our base and jumping to conclusions....and ignoring the fact I had 3 kills. I sent him a tersely worded message just before the game ended.

The reality is that hardly any one will listen to tactical suggestions even if you are the highest tier tank on the team, but it's ok because you can just curse at them until the game ends when they fuck it up and lose. That guy was mistaken, you actually went back to cover the base, but in his defense, I've seen plenty of IS-3 camp base the entire game. Yes, it's a strange game now. In Beta tests, teams actually worked together somewhat. In release, it's become more and more about every tank for itself.

I love it on cliff, when no one decides to cover the west side straightway, and what happens?

Aye, but the result is so much worse when 2/3 of the team decides to squeeze into the low ground and sit there the entire game while you get flanked from higher ground.

[Devec]

Don´t you just hate it whenever your entire team storms off, leaving the base completely open for a t-50 which is spotted within minutes, just to have it strolling in your base destroying all the artillery. Really the t-50 might be too fast for your standard arty but any other tank should be able to make mince meat out of it.

[Max Teranous]

I love it on cliff, when no one decides to cover the west side straightway, and what happens? A lowly scout comes roaming through killing all arty and starts capping.... Terrible teams are terrible.

Oh hey i got 5 kills in my leopard and won by capping in like 3 minutes doing exactly that yesterday. Was my double XP game as well

Max

[Silenos Lakedaimon]

so, i was one of the lowest tier tanks, and i think one of 3 mediums on our side on himmelsdorf in my panther.
managed to hold down 2 type 59 and a tiger II that were afraid to push, dunno why tbh...
pin them there for the first 5 minutes. look at the map, realise i am the only one left -.-

FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

[Carlo Curiosus]

so, i was one of the lowest tier tanks, and i think one of 3 mediums on our side on himmelsdorf in my panther.
managed to hold down 2 type 59 and a tiger II that were afraid to push, dunno why tbh...

Holding back 3 tier 6 mediums in my derp KV was fairly amusing. I forget the map, but it's not like you need a lot of space to flank a KV with 24 second reload...

[Corwyna]

Holding back 3 tier 6 mediums in my derp KV was fairly amusing. I forget the map, but it's not like you need a lot of space to flank a KV with 24 second reload...

Fear factor of derp KV is awesome